by a thread on september mommies. here are things i've been saying to liam that i never pictured myself saying:
"please don't bite mommy's bum"
"we don't color on the computer in our house"
"it hurts when you poke mommy's eyes!"
"its okay to be angry but please don't bang your head against the wall"
"that's your penis. no, don't pull on it!"
"we don't poop in the tub"
what are the stupid sounding things you never thought you'd say??
Wednesday, February 25, 2009
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Yup. That pretty much sums it up.
I once had to tell Zane to take his finger out of the dog's butt. Not cool.
I like how it's only in your house that you don't color on computers. It's ok everywhere else, liam, but not in our house!
That's funny! Every time I change Lev's diaper (every time!) I have to remind him that "It's not nice to rub oolig (his stuffed lamb) on our winky" He does this with a smile on his face and it's HIGHLY disturbing LOL.
lulu does your boy hump stuff too? mine has started doing that & it freaks me out
ew kaila i just re-read your comment. that's disgusting & hilarious
DPH i am way too relaxed. he colors on everything & i don't really mind b/c he should be free to express himself. but i literally do draw the line at coloring on the computer tower
Hahaha - these are great, Jenny!! I haven't said much yet, but:
- we don't chew on laptop power cords
and
- stop licking the oven
are two that come to mind :)
"I am not your personal trampoline!"
"that does NOT belong in your mouth."
Things I've said to my chilren...hmmm. Heavens forgive me, but about 75% of the things that come out of my mouth when my kids are misbehaving are those things that my parents said to me that I swore I would never say to my own children. Gosh, every day I hear more of my mother...sigh...
We've all said some pretty crazy things as moms! How about: stop pulling kitty's tail? When I had a cat I had to say that A LOT and I could not stand it!
Top this one, "take the straw out of the kitties bum," or "How did you get the marbles up there without the cat biting you?"
Yes, these words have actually been spoken in my house LOL.
LOL...my son is 11 months so we haven't said a lot of these yet but I do recall telling him "Get that poopy diaper out of your mouth" and "no toilet". I guess he is fixated on crappy (pun intended) things.
why are toddlers so obsessed with cramming things in holes? butts, eyes, noses, ears, mouths...
Ha! There are so many, where do I start?!
*Please don't grab my boob!
*Stop eating off the floor!
*Stop drinking the bath water!
*DO not play in the toilet!
*If you've pooped in your pants, don't take them off and then proceed to sit on the carpet!
Why are boys so gross?! LOL But I love him to pieces!
Just wait until your kids get older and you start saying "If all the other kids jumped off a bridge would you?" and "because I said so",things you promised yourself you would never, ever say.
Absolutely adorable! What a wonderful sense of humor.
Great post -- I am visiting from Momlogic and so happy you are being profiled today. I am forever telling my little 2.5 year to put her clothes back on!! Its so funnyt o hear what comes out of Mommies mouth's!!! Have a wonderful weekend!
Welcome to momlogic. I loved your list. Too funny.It seems that all boys come out knowing all of these disgusting habits. My son is 18 and still misses the toilet (just like his dad).lol
I often wonder who's picking up my dumb comments on the baby monitor. My favorite recently - "it's not polite to sit on your sister's head." Sheesh.
I laughed so hard when I saw this, it's deja Vu!
I think one think that sticks out was about 2 years ago, my kids (then 4 and 5) both wanted the toilet. I said for them to go, expecting them to take turns. Oh no, they had a better plan.
I went to check on them, and found them both on the toilet at the same time, cheering out 'WE MADE A POO TRAIN!!!'
I have heard myself saying,Please don't stuff toys up your nose. and please don't eat the dolls shoes.
I came home from work on evening and all my good crystal was on the back deck rail ,all filled with different amounts of water.The boys were making music.
Gotta love them!!
How about:
Chicken is for eating, not rubbing on your head.
Vanburenmom from MomLogic checking in... the strangest things I have said to my kids... hmmm...
"No Devin we do not pull our penis with toy pliers!" He was 1... did it several times, doesn't that hurt??
and "Melly please don't try to pull out your brother's eyes, he doesn't like it!" She is 1 and he is 5 now
Working at a school i have to say "keep your hands AND FEET to yourself!" a lot. Some kids tried to slip through that loophole so now I have to specify :)
OMG those quotes are all too familiar!! ha!! I'm glad Mom Logic's promo sent me here! Tomorrow, the 28th, is my son's birthday. He's very funny. One time, when he was about 3 I had to "unwrap" him from several rolls of toilet paper he made himself a mummy with. It's something new every day! vac924@gmail.com
We were trying to get my (ADHD) daughter to finish one thing before she abandons it for another.... and I found myself saying, "You may not have any carrots until you finish your French Fries!"
I'm sorry I can't understand you, but that doesn't give you the right to swing at me.
And I must say that I enjoyed reading your blog here. A short and sweet mouthful!! Thanks
Hi Jennifer
Those are great - some of my top ones now are:
-no poopies on the floor
-don't swing on the dog's tail
-don't eat things off the sidewalk
-picking up bugs is yucky
-don't lick your brother
-the puppy doesn't like to be poked in the eye
and one of my favorites - don't try to catch your pee.
these stories are all great!
this morning liam tried to touch his poopy bum when i was cleaning him up & i found myself saying "don't stick your fingers in your poop!"
Entering our library one day my son yelled out, "can I shit over there". I'm not sure where he picked the term up, perhaps in preschool. I quickly corrected him lousdly with a "of course you can SIT over there" hoping that the those in ear shot thought perhaps they heard him incorrectly. We still laugh about it.
Please keep writing for momlogic, your great.
Usually I'm telling them not to drink the bathwater.
karen i bust a nut laughing over that!! too funny
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