with some coloring! why not?




with some coloring! why not?




when he doesn't get what he wants, liam has started standing in between my legs and its so bizarre... how do i explain this? he sort of hangs his arms limply at his sides and just rests his head in the hollow of my legs at the crotch of my jeans. sometimes he'll wrap his arms around so he's grabbing both my butt cheeks.
here are the fourteen philosophical questions that Buddha refused to answer. lucky for you, i'm not Buddha!
Questions referring to the world: concerning the existence of the world in time
Questions referring to the world: concerning the existence of the world in space
Questions referring to life after death
eric the lovely network administrator over at my pimp MomLogic contacted me the other day to tell me he is dying to buy me a massive diamond ring because - his words - he's madly in love with me. then he twittered about it. then he called me on the phone and said (in his he-man voice) "i have the power!" then he sang me a song he wrote just for me.
okay. none of that is true, but it would be sweet if it was.
what really happened was, eric the lovely network administrator contacted me to see if i would blog for the momlogic community coffee club. which confused me a little bit because i thought i'd have to write about coffee and how is that related to mom blogging and i'm confused? eric, use little words!
so eric explained to me (in kid speak) that every single day - for a month - you (my readers) will have a chance to win a Keurig Single-Cup Coffee Maker for the low, low price of jumping through a couple of hoops and leaving comments in a couple of places. clickitty click, that's easy and free!
how do you win?
Step 1 - leave a comment on my MLC Coffee Club Featured post called Inspired
Step 2 - leave a comment on my MLC profile page
Step 3 - join the MLC Coffee Club which you should have already done because you're a smokin' hot super mom
that's it! *insert hand dusting motions here*
you might be the lucky winner. you might not, but you also might! who knows?
by a thread on september mommies. here are things i've been saying to liam that i never pictured myself saying:
"please don't bite mommy's bum"
"we don't color on the computer in our house"
"it hurts when you poke mommy's eyes!"
"its okay to be angry but please don't bang your head against the wall"
"that's your penis. no, don't pull on it!"
"we don't poop in the tub"
what are the stupid sounding things you never thought you'd say??
last week liam decided it would be a great idea to wear a colander as a hat and run around the house with a sieve in his mouth. as you can see, he looked like a rock star

he also decided it would be a lot of fun to play in the big snow pile in front of our house. the weekend naners and pop pop were here we got FED UP with the missing mittens saga and found a kiosk in the mall that was selling mittens on strings that do up with velcro. they are lined on the inside and have no thumb hole which is perfect for little grasping hands (in that he has a hard time pulling them off ;)

daweski and i went to the grocery store to develop some film and saw this. they're popping up all over ottawa. those ruffian kids sure are keeping busy
1. Do you like blue cheese? hells no!
2. What is your favorite holiday? may 24
3. Do you own a gun? i wish!! there are a couple people i'd love to shoot
4. What flavor of Kool Aid was your favorite? green
5. Do you get nervous before doctor appointments? not unless its for a pap
6. What do you think of hot dogs? they are aces bbq'd with chips
7. Favorite Christmas movie? ralphie! (a christmas story) or family man (makes me cry every time)
8. What do you prefer to drink in the morning? coffee. timmies. 3x3
9. Can you do push ups? with my toes. toe-ups. or standing on my tip toes
10. What's your favorite piece of jewelry? the one we talk about
11. Favorite hobby? bikram yoga
12. Do you have A.D.D.? no, apparently i have ADHD but there is some debate over whether i really have it or not. my head guy says i should've been skipped a grade and was mis-diagnosed. who knows?
13. What's your favorite shoe? *cries* its this pair of shoes i absolutely love that i lost the mate to sometime this winter. really i'm ripped up inside about it. every time i see its lone mate in the closet i get sniffly.
14. What's your middle name? Allison
15. Name 3 thoughts at this exact moment?
a. daweski should be off work soon and he's cooking me steak tonight
b. just said goodbye to liam for the week and feeling sad and bummed out because i'll miss him
c. why is my iphone software update taking so long to load?? (going on 38 minutes of 60)
16. Name 3 drinks you regularly drink? water, coffee, wine
17. Current worry? deadlines
18. Current hate right now? deadlines
20. How did you bring in the New Year? in a restaurant with my best friends
21. Where would you like to go? England
22. Name three people who will complete this? zero since i'm not inflicting this on anyone else
23. Do you own slippers? two pairs of the ugliest ass slippers you will ever see but they are so compfy
24. What color shirt are you wearing right now? yellow tank and a grey/black/white plaid suit jacket (with dark denim)
25. Do you like sleeping on satin sheets? no i hate how slippery they feel
26. Can you whistle? like a train!
27. Favorite colors? purple, blue, red, white, black, green, orange, etc. i love them all
28. Would you be a pirate? i'd rather be a vampire
29. What songs do you sing in the shower? super mario theme song
30. Favorite girl's Name? meghan
31. Favorite boy's name? dexter (i know thats not very loyal to liam but i really, really wanted to call him dexter)
32. What's in your pocket right now? mac lipglass
33. Last thing that made you laugh? lunch today, my co-workers talking about what a skank my old co-worker was
34. Best bed sheets as a child? strawberry short cake
35. Worst injury you've ever had as a child? none! would you believe i've still never broken a bone, been stung by a bee or had a cavity? up until my implants i'd never had stitches either
37. Who is the friend you've had the longest? carrie sinkowski
38. Who is your loudest friend? louder than me? no one!
39. How many dogs do you have? 0 but i used to have 1
40. Does someone have a crush on you? probably i'm pretty hot, smart and fantastically fun to be around
41. What is your favorite book? impossible to pick just one but i'm on the 3rd book in the sookie stackhouse series
42. What is your favorite candy? always go for Eatmore. its an old lady candy bar but i love it
43. Favorite Sports Team? pass
44. Favorite Movie? say anything or robin hood men in tights
i can't wrap my head around how to write this post so i'll just give you the highlights:
- my parents like daweski
- daweski likes my parents
- daweski made us dinner which went over very well and my sister Bex said it was the best roast she's ever had (even better than mom's, which i don't think mom appreciated) my dad ate everything on his plate, then all the left overs on moms and i think that if daweski weren't there he would've polished off my plate too
- liam ate everything including the gravy
- while the ladies were doing dishes daweski and my dad had a man-to-man chat in the living room and bonded solidly for over half an hour as they discussed my personal life (separation/divorce); their personal lives (growing up with similar backgrounds); my personal life again (liam and the custody arrangement); some other issues going on in my family and other highly embarrassing things that i still can't believe they talked about the first time they ever met (there was a point i couldn't take it anymore and stalked into the living room and sort of growled "would you two please stop talking about this-and-that!")
- after which my dad informed me that a) daweski is probably smarter than me (wtf dad? ouch!) and b) he was highly impressed a man i am dating spent the time to get to know him and have a man-to-man chat
- this led into the game of quelf. where the 5 of us ended up having to complete tasks or sing songs or dance like idiots to move around spaces on the board to win the game
like this, where i am doing a hula dance
or this, where we had to wear napkin bibs for the whole game
or this, where my sister had to shove 'single objects' down her shirt before the time ran out
- there were no weird silences
- there was no fighting
- no one said anything overly inappropriate and my parents (thank you parents!) stayed off all NONO topics like: religion, race, homosexuality, money, politics, etc.
- the telephone debrief with mom yielded a 'thumbs up' and a 'you seem very well suited for each other' and a 'he is a very nice, down to earth man who doesn't take himself too seriously'
high praise from the parents
i end this post with an inside joke for the family: "it was October 31st..."
ps. during Quelf my mom had to end all her sentences with "izzle", my dad had to snort like a pig every time he laughed and we ALL had to wear those stupid napkin bibs except for mom because she was the queen
the valentines parental meet-up weekend was a smashing success. by smashing i don't mean that things got smashed. they didn't. not one thing.
friday night was pretty chill after we got over the mad rush of gathering liam up from his dad's house, ordering 3 medium pizza's in the car on the way back to my place, getting liam & all his junk upstairs, hat off, boots off, coat off, mittens... where did those mittens go? doorbell. ring! pizza man with my parents trailing directly behind. everyone hugs everyone everyone else (i think the pizza man even got a hug in there somewhere) & upstairs to feast. clean up, bath, books, bottle, bed & we finally had a chance to sit down to chat - which didn't last long because everyone was tired, so they left & we met up the next day.
but first we had a quick photoshoot.
saturday is a bit of a whirl. more on that later. honestly i know you're all dying to know how "meeting daweski" went so i promise to get back to that soon.
sunday we met at Zak's diner in the market where liam colored and became obsessed with staring at every single toddler we passed (or sat close to).
after breakfast we went to winterlude where bex got a picture of us standing around.
and a picture of us posing.
we toured the half melted ice sculptures and liam made some new friends.
nanners ate her first beavertail, then bought this stupid looking ear warmer hat thing (not pictured).
then we got really cold and decided to call it a day.
the next day was monday and we did more stuff i'll blog about later. but we found time to watch the movie Enchanted and to relax. which was nice.
then i got my period and turned into a grouchy monster.
the end.
sometimes someone says something that just gets me 'right there' in the funny bone
is probably the lamest holiday ever invented by hallmark. this year i'm celebrating it with my boyfriend and my parents. yep. my parents. they are coming tonight for the weekend since monday is "family day" and we all have the day off work (everyone except public servants. ha!).
since my parents are going to be here i won't have time to update with posts so i need to do this valentines day ting today (which is actually last night). here is what i'm thinking. i've met someone who makes me really happy. who gets me. who has the same likes, dislikes, interests, personality, sense of humor. who has a great relationship with his family (who are all very nice too). someone who treats me like royalty and who genuinely cares about my son (and who has on occasion called me 'princess'. the first time he did it i made 'gag' motions and sounds which hurt his feelings. i'm still trying to get used to the moniker but knowing that he means it genuinely and not the least bit condescending makes me warm and fuzzy). the point being, he is very good to me.
i wish that we could spend this holiday - as stupid as it is - somewhere nice, relaxing together because since december my work schedule has been intense. he has been very understanding and helpful, giving of his time and his energy to help me, ensuring that my life outside of work hasn't been put on hold because my life inside work has been taking over. he's cooked dinners, made lunches, cleaned up, given massages, wiped away tears, told jokes, poured glasses of wine, sent me sweet texts which really help bolster my spirits when i'm in the middle of a grueling day.
he deserves a night out with me where we're not talking about my deadlines. he deserves so much more than what he's getting this weekend - which is the following: he is going to be cooking dinner (because he's a 5-star chef. holla) for my parents, sister and myself while concurrently meeting my parents for the first time.
happy valentines day honey! if we survive this weekend i promise to make it up to you.
Q1 - Hello and Goodbye: Do you wave at people on trains or boats as they pass by?
no but i always, always honk and wave at people who are driving the same car as me because we're in the same-car-club. usually they look at me with a confused half smile while i grin dementedly and point down (using pointy motions, you know the kind) from my drivers side window. in hindsight it might look like i'm coming on them. ahhh. that explains a lot. making a sign to stash in the car that says "i'm pointing at our matching cars, not my crotch!" might be a good idea.
Q2 - Library Books: Do you think people who fail to return books to public libraries should face criminal charges?
yes and i also think we should take them out back behind the shed and give them a lashing they'll never forget. now where is that 'eye roll' emoticon..
Q3 - Acronyms: If each of the letters in your first name combined to form an acronym, what would your acronym be?
using this Acronym Creator my name is: Jerky, Elementary Nutball, Nefarious
mmmm nutballs...
this is fun! using this Acronym Creator, my name is: Jack-in-the-pulpit Eclectic Nauseatingly Needlework Yourself. that just sounds painful. (why is this linking? stop linking. no really, stop it!)
Q4 - Approval: According to a Gallup Poll conducted earlier this week, President Obama's approval rating is 65 percent, which is nearly identical as when he was inaugurated. Do you approve or disapprove of the job the President is doing?
neither/or/and/what? me too! i'm confused. presidents have a job???
what i really want to know is, what is your Acronym?
a man offered to clean my bathroom this weekend.
take a second to let that sink in.
not only did he offer, but then he did it. he did an excellent job of it. so good that i took a photo. partly because i am having a hard time believing it really happened. its like seeing a unicorn. what man offers to clean, then actually does it and does it well? mine. that's who.
*the photo will go here tonight*
then he asked what else he could do to help me because, in his words "i just want to make your life easier" swoon so i mentioned that there was a lot to get through like sweeping and dishes and dusting the coffee table. so he offered to sweep and ended up sweeping my whole apartment. then he dusted. then he cooked me dinner.
i know, right?
edited to add: kaila there is a difference between offering and being asked. that's why this is so surprising. there was no asking. none. just offering. big difference.
also we don't live together. how amazing is that? he did all this - truly - just because he is a very nice man.
my littlest sister Kim's daughter Gwen is crawling & she got it on video. its too adorable so i thought you'd all like to see it.
okay readers you know what day it is, its four for friday!
Q1 - Admission: Purdue University in West Lafayette, Indiana, is considering whether to raise its academic admission requirements so that students earning non-honors high school diplomas wouldn't be accepted. Do you think it's okay for public colleges and universities to require such rigid entrance requirements, or, should public colleges and universities consider each applicant on his or her own merits regardless of whether they graduated high school with honors?
i think that the real question here is public vs private. if this were a private university then it would be fine for them to dictate whatever entrance criteria they wished. since its public, i feel that what they're doing borders on discrimination which sets them up for a whole whack of problems.
Q2 - Feelings: What matches your mood right now?
blankets, cuddle pillows, chicken soup, NyQuil, mister mouse, movies, books, Daweski keeping me company on the couch. i'm coming down with something even though i've been fighting it now for two days with ColdFX and vitamin C... don't know how much longer i can keep fighting it off since i haven't really had any time to relax since before December. my mood = blah.
Q3 - Co-Workers: If you could choose anyone--dead or alive--as a co-worker, who would you like to work with and what position within your company would that person hold?
when i was in Jamaica my good friend at work, Kris, asked me who my idol was. his is Arnold Schwarzenegger. we had this conversation on the beach with a glass of booze and a big cigar just after sunset. i really had to think for a while, not because i didn't know who my role model is, but because i wanted to be able to substantiate WHY properly.
the who is Cleopatra. the why is simple: she was the youngest queen ever to rule in a male-dominated period of history. she had four children while bringing Egypt from the brink of bankruptcy to being the most affluent capital in the hemisphere (yes, even more so than Rome). she was the first ruler in 300 years to learn the Egyptian language which enabled her to talk to the common people and learn their views which, in turn, taught her how to be a better ruler to them (ie. what was really important to the people vs what the monarchy perceived was important). she valued culture, art, beauty and tirelessly funded renovations in Alexandria to ensure that it was (and would remain) the most beautiful city of their time. as a leader she was married three times and outlived all of her husbands. she saw Egypt through two super famines by having the foresight to accumulate grain and oil (as a means to trade for grain) while rationing to her city ensuring her population was fed. she was generous, even-handed, wise for her years and valued peace, except if it conflicted with her love life (which is a miracle really, because anyone in her position of power would most likely have sacrificed love for money [therein avoiding war with Rome]. that alone tells me she possessed a strong work/life balance, or that she actively tried to foster one).
there is just so much more to Cleopatra than most people know or give her credit for.
as for her position, that's easy, she would be on the board of directors where she would act in a consulting capacity and direct mentor to me!
Q4 - Ownership: If you are with a small group of people (i.e., in a car or small conference room) and you initiate a silent-but-deadly flatulent emission, do you own up to it or simply ignore it and hope everyone else does the same?
ignore it and/or blame it on someone else. thats where liam comes in handy. i blame farts on him all the time.
what do you think? if you dealt it would you own up to it?
neverclever tagged me and since she's one hot piece of mom ass i am playing along.
this was quite possibly the best sunday ever and i'm not saying that lightly because there have been quite a few stellar sunday's in my life.
waking up early we took liam to breakfast at our favorite weekend breakfast spot which is something we've done a few times now. its excellent for liam because he gets to practice eating in public, not something toddlers get a chance to do very often. its also a great experience for him because it teaches 'indoor manners', patience and respect. liam colored on a crazy ass placemat with old school toxic crayons (a first!) and developed a strange facial rash (not a first) from those same crayons (i think). he happily ate his cheerios, yogurt and apple sauce while balancing two toy trucks one on top of the other.
after that we took a drive out to orleans to visit some special people and liam saw a snowmobile and was terrified of it (which was cute because he shrieked, but also sad because he was genuinely upset by it - possibly because of how loud it was?). then we had lunch and i put dinner in the slow cooker (homemade meatballs), then everyone had a nap.
after the 2.5 hour nap we had a snack, got bundled up again and went to the science and technology museum where liam ran like a mad man through the halls giggling and vocalizing. we found a room chronically the history of telephones and - predictably - liam went ape shit roaming from phone to phone talking up a storm of incoherent babble to the previously recorded voices.
then there was this at the space exploration station...
and a little bit of this at the video game consol station (which was broken) ....
2 hours later and we were all exhausted. so we went to the store inside the museum and bought liam a souvenier (two toy trucks). after that we came home, pulled the meatballs out of the slow cooker and enjoyed an amazing spaghetti dinner which liam devoured shirtless because he can't eat pasta without getting it all over himself.
dinner done and kitchen cleaned up we sat down to watch baby einstein before putting liam to bed. during one of the video segments the children sing the "A-B-C" song. the first time they did it liam mumbled something which sounded like "A-B..." i wasn't really sure if he did it or not so the next time the song came on i was paying close attention. the children started "A-B-C" and liam audibly said - again - what sounded like the beginning of the song but it still wasn't very clear and i couldn't be sure. the third time the song was repeated he knew exactly when it was coming on and said in a very loud, very clear voice "A-B!"
i praised him loud and long and vowed to blog about it because it was the first time i've ever heard liam sing anything, let alone the first two letters of the alphabet.
what a perfect sunday. how about you? what is the story of your best sunday?